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Problems: If you put them down, they might not be there when you come back

You don’t have to stick your head in the sand in order to give your mind a break

When confronted with an unexpected challenge that throws our routine off kilter, it is easy to feel as if that challenge must be treated with urgency and immediately resolved. The prospect of moving forward with one’s day and coming back to it at a more opportune time sometimes feels negligent.

Rather than obsess over a problem by forcing a solution to come to you right here and now, experiment with the option of backing off the issue for a bit and focusing that same energy on reinforcing your connection to a more positive, peaceful state.

This is not a matter of sticking one’s head in the sand or being irresponsible. It’s a pragmatic decision rooted in the understanding that we have greater access to both our logical mind and our creative mind when our thoughts are unclouded by the frustration that stems from mentally and verbally rehearsing difficulties over and over again.

What follows is my two cents on taking a step back from our problems.

Keeping it simple is still a good idea

First, if there’s some simple action you can take to remove the problem, then by all means do so.

If there’s a mosquito on your arm and it’s bugging you (no pun intended), there’s no need for you to go into transcendental meditation to find some enlightened insight about it.

You don’t have to ask “what would Jesus do?” about that one, my friends. Just shoo the fly away!

However, if you’ve spent 30 minutes or more trying to figure it all out and you’re not gaining progress, you just might be pushing yourself further away from a truly satisfying solution.

Don’t be a slave to the tyranny of urgency

When many people get to this point, they allow the urgency of the situation to dominate their minds and they choose to do something extreme in order to achieve closure.

An unhealthy surface level solution that brings temporary relief is often thought to be better than a healthy solution that wont show up until a few hours or days later. This is why most people’s problems are reoccurring.

Rather than take the time to address the root issue, we take the CSI MIAMI approach by attempting to eliminate all of our dramas in an hour or less. This leads to quick fix solutions that help us get through the day, but it leaves us defenseless against future manifestations of the same underlying issue.

How can one take such a patient approach when you have an unresolved problem just staring you in the face?

In my next post, I’ll offer my two cents on why we find it so difficult to let go of our problems long enough to find solutions that do more than numb the pain with quick fixes.

Here’s a hint: It has less to do with the actual problem and more to do with how much you trust yourself.

I hope you’ll join me for Tomorrow’s post.

In the meantime, create a great day 🙂


T.K. Coleman

This Post Has 3 Comments
  1. Hey TK…. didn’t see yesterdays post but only breezed by once mid-day and was tied up rest of day. Must have posted it later? Sorry to miss but will pick up from here.

    I have learned to practice the walk-away approach to problem-solving when my head gets to noisy with fatigue or frustration.

    I have practiced it long enough now to trust it. It has proven to me to get results. Many a time, when I feel I am at a stalemate with a task or problem, I simply walk away from it for a time. Not quit, but, like a boxer, go back to my corner for a moment.

    More recently, I take a moment and specifically surrender the problem. In my experience, surrender has two distinct aspects. The first is going hands-off. The next is turning it over to a power greater than myself (to borrow AA lingo), which in my case is God, and then letting him direct traffic in the matter.

    When I return to the problem, I have enjoyed the practical benefits of an emotional reset so my head isn’t so noisy. I then step out in faith and do the first thing I sense I am being directed to do. Which usually leads to something else and something else, and before I know it, the problem is solved.

    By the time I am frustrated, my flawed thinking is directing traffic. The pause allows me to step back from the flawed thinking, and use the natural and supernatural resources available to me. Why not? They are free gifts and in abundance in our world. The only keeping us from them is ourselves!

    In AA, we have a saying. “Surrender is not the act of quitting. It is the act of joining the winning team”.

    Thanks again for your posts… I continue to find great value in them and will continue to stop by.



    1. Chaz,

      Thanks for showing up so frequently and consistently with your feedback and support. More importantly, thanks for all the sharing of insight that has been a part of our dialogue. I received much benefit from our exchanges this past week, bro. I thought your personal testimony from this comment was so inspiring that I had to incorporate it into a blog post. I love the AA quote about “surrender”. That singlehandly gives the word a whole new connotation for me. I’m enjoying the increasing levels of freedom that come about from this more positive understanding of surrender! Thanks a million for turning me on to that.



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