skip to Main Content

Am I using the right words to attract what I want? Thoughts on language and attraction

To deny or not to deny, that is the question

Many of the earlier writers in New Thought Philosophy advocated a practice called “denials.” Denials are the opposite of “affirmations.” An “affirmation” is a positive statement or declaration, usually made in the present-tense, about a desirable condition or attitude that one wishes to create or manifest in his personal life. An example of an affirmation would be the following:

“Abundance is my natural state. Therefore wealth flows into my experience effortlessly and easily.”

A denial, on the other hand, is a statement or declaration which seeks to dissolve an unwanted condition by negating its presence and power in one’s life. An example of a denial would be the following:

I now release all thoughts of lack and limitation. I banish the idea of scarcity from my consciousness and I cast every self-defeating thought out of my mind.

In short, affirmations announce what is wanted while denials denounce what is unwanted.

Am I attracting bad things when I use negatives?

In contemporary literature on the law of attraction and the power of positive thinking, we are frequently advised about the negative effects of using language to discuss or describe that which is not wanted.

For instance, in the best-selling book The Secret, we are told:

The law of attraction doesn’t compute ‘don’t’ or ‘not’ or ‘no,’ or any other words of negation. As you speak words of negation this is what the law of attraction is receiving:
“I don’t want to spill something on this outfit.” means “I want to spill something on this outfit and I want to spill more things.”
“I don’t want a bad haircut.”  means “I want bad haircuts.”

Elsewhere, Abraham Hicks says the following:

When you look at something and shout “No, I don’t want to experience that; go away!” then what you are actually doing is calling it into your experience, for there is no such thing as “No” in an attraction-based Universe. Your attention to it says, “Yes, come to me this thing I do not want!”

So which is it? Can we use a combination of affirmations & denials or is it just best to stay away from all forms of negation?

Moreover, is it possible that, in spite of our best intentions, we may be using the wrong words altogether in our efforts to attract positive realities?

Here’s my two cents:

Don’t worry, be happy

When you worry about whether you’re using the right words or not, you hold yourself out of alignment with the broader part of you which always knows that all is well.

Don’t focus too much on words. Focus on how you FEEL when you say the words.

The Universe is not a “by the book” grammar cop that  judges us based on the technicalities and dictionary definitions of the words we use. The Universe responds to the energy BEHIND the things we say and do.

The art of allowing well-being into our experience is partly a verbal art, but primarily a vibrational art. If we concentrate on focusing our attention in a way that feels empowering, then we wont have to fret over wrong word choices, semantic slips, negatives, double negatives, or any other linguistic nuances.

We will never fool the Universe with word-trickery when our vibration is resistant, nor will we miss out on positive opportunities because of “bad” vocabulary choices when our vibration is resistant-free.

If we say all the right things while still harboring resistant emotion, we will attract according to those negative feelings not the positive words. Even if our word choices are sub par, however, we will still attract wonderful experiences if we’re connected to the joy of Source.

In all things, guide yourself by the way you feel.

If it feels “off” to you, drop it, let it go, and move on. It is never necessary to persist in a practice that violates your inner guidance just because the “experts” advocate it.

Conversely, if it feels exciting to you, then keep doing whatever it is that gets your energy flowing in the right direction. There is no need to abandon that which receives the approval of your inner guidance because of the teachings of respected authorities.

YOU, and only YOU, know what is right for YOU. So, “to thine own self be true” as you say and do what your heart tells you to.

Those are MY thoughts. What are yours?

T.K. Coleman

This Post Has 7 Comments
  1. I love what you’re saying here – I can totally agree that saying any affirmation while holding a belief/thought/energy that is negative or in opposition to that affirmation will actually focus us on the negative – we are energy beings – words are just one small(but important!) part of how that energy is expressed!

  2. What a wonderful perspective. I learned something yet again.. the art of allowing GOOD vibrations.. even with not so good situations.. denials ? well.. they do make the affirmations go straight to my vortex.. (gives me a lot of comfort) (smile) Living in the moment.. thank you. gini (heart) here..

    1. You got it, Gini! It’s all about those good vibrations. You just can’t lose when you’re feeling good.
      Keep living in the moment, my friend. Thanks for stopping by and sharing your thoughts.

      Cheers 🙂


  3. Perfect! There is a phrase I devised to help me to remember such lessons. That is: “What you don’t want, you want.” It is a reminder of where I am focusing my energy. Also, I Appreciate your “by the book” comment. Nothing proves that better than our society’s use of “cuss words.” The S-word and the F-word are used interchangeably with a myriad of other terms. Yet when someone says one, you know exactly what they mean. What is strongest is the FEELING one is trying to convey.

Leave a Reply

Back To Top