Have you ever had a moment when someone got under your skin so bad that you wanted to lose your cool and snap?
It happens to all of us at least every once in a while.
People often ask me, “T.K., doesn’t it ever annoy you when you feel like you have to be the bigger man all the time?”
The short answer to that question is “yes.”
But here’s one of the valuable lessons life has taught me about losing one’s cool:
When you allow your frustration with a situation to make you lose self-control, people aren’t going to hold a conference and try to figure out what provoked you and how they can help alleviate the cause of your outrage. They’re just going to look at you (and treat you) like you’re crazy. In your head, you will be the misunderstood righteous person. In everyone else’s head, you’ll just be the crazy guy or the crazy lady doing the crazy things that crazy people do. You wont get your point across. You wont win the room. You wont gain anyone’s trust.
Being the bigger man isn’t about doing the right things so you can go to Heaven when you die. It’s about valuing what you have to say enough to abstain from the kind of behavior that will make you lose your audience every single time.
Sometimes you’ll run into people who know exactly what to say and how to say it to get a rise out of you.
When that happens, keep your cool. It might feel as if you’re letting them win, but the real winner is you.
It’s extremely difficult to stop a person with a level head and a clear conscience from being successful in the long run.
A person who lacks the ability to control their temper, however, doesn’t need an enemy because they’ll defeat themselves over and over again until they learn this lesson.
At least that’s the way I see it.
What about you?