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Everything I’ve learned has failed me

Over the years, I’ve heard many amazing insights and I’ve received lots of helpful advice from intelligent, successful, and influential people.

Of ALL the insights and bits of advice that have been handed to me, NONE, and I mean absolutely NONE, have EVER worked for ME on the first try.

There literally isn’t a single tip, tool, or technique I’ve picked up from the world of personal development, spirituality, and self-help that hasn’t failed me right out of the gate.

In every case where I’ve tried to apply new information to some dilemma in my life, there has always been some nuance in my situation that made matters a bit more complicated than I what I originally expected.

In order to fully extract the benefits from the knowledge I’ve gained, it has been necessary for me to tweak, try again, stay positive, tweak, try again, keep the faith, tweak, try again, don’t quit, tweak, try again, try again, try again, and then, FINALLY, I’d find a way to make it work for ME.

Here’s today’s two cents:

New understandings require time, experimentation, feedback from others, and ongoing refinement in order to be effectively integrated into your life.

No matter what you learn, and regardless of who you learn it from, there will always be details in your life that initially seem to fly in the face of your newly acquired wisdom.

Maybe YOUR spouse is different from the one’s in the textbook examples.

Maybe YOUR coworkers are nothing like the one’s the seminar leaders talk about.

Maybe YOUR toxic friend is immune to everything in the “101 things to say to your toxic friend” book.

Maybe YOUR business can’t use any of the tips in the “10 ways to improve your small business” article.

Maybe YOUR demons don’t respond to any of the prayers in the “how to exorcise your demons” book.

Maybe YOUR body has all sorts of quirky things going on and none of those details were even addressed in the “Better Body in 40 days” book.

Maybe YOUR love life has all sorts of special considerations and, hence, is completely unresponsive to “Dr. Love’s Foolproof Guide to Never Playing the Fool Again.”

So be it!

Welcome to the club! Welcome to personal development!

Welcome to what everyone who has ever overcome an obstacle has had to do!

These are not reasons to walk away. These are reasons to buckle down, step it up, and do your homework.

Knowledge is power, but the power of knowledge can’t be realized unless you’re willing to be persistent, creative, and self-determined in your application of it.

That’s today’s two cents.


T.K. Coleman

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  1. Oh so true! Wonderfully insightful and helpful post, T.K.! Another to hang on my wall. 🙂 Thanks again! Cheers 🙂

  2. Happy New Year!

    Absolutely! T.K.

    Anything worthwhile can’t be that easy or it wouldn’t be valued. If there were a book entitled
    “Living Life for Well Dummies” seems a contradiction.

    And for any new worthwhile undertaking: “It’s always hard til it’s easy.”

    So…. Repetition is Mastery.

    We don’t fail when we fall down. We fail when we don’t get back up.

    “Persistent. Creative. Self-determined.” You bet. 🙂



  3. On that note: do you have any books to recommend for one who has just started to take responsibility for his own development? Very contradictory to what you wrote, but im looking for input to expand my spiritual horizon. No silver bullets, just insights and thoughts towards daily and social things from ordinary men.

    Great post as always! 🙂

    1. Hi Afro Jay Thunder,

      So many good books out there in the self-help section and worth the read.

      May I suggest:

      The Psychology of Self-Esteem (Nathaniel Branden)
      10 Dumbest Mistakes Smart People Make (Arthur Freeman)
      Pulling Your Own Strings (Wayne Dyer)
      Your Erroneous Zones (Wayne Dyer)
      I’m OK—You’re OK (Thomas A. Harris)
      How to Stop Worrying and Start Living (Dale Carnegie)
      How to Win Friends and Influence People (Dale Carnegie)
      Think and Grow Rich (Napoleon Hill)
      Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff (Richard Carlson) …and It’s All Small Stuff.
      Feeling Good (David D. Burns)
      7 Habits of Highly Efffective People (Stephen R. Covey) Powerful Lessons in Personal Change
      Life’s Little Instruction Book (H. Jackson Brown)

      Etc., etc., etc.

      Also suggest lots of biographies.

      Enjoy your journey.



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