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Send it to the cemetary

cemetary“Be peaceful, be courteous, obey the law, respect everyone; but if someone puts his hand on you, send him to the cemetery.” -Malcolm X

The value of self-defense is not limited to physical and political bullies.

Psychological freedom, much like physical and political freedom, requires vigilance.

If you’re not militant about your well-being, this world will knock the wind out of your sails, flatten you on your back, and grind you beneath its feet.

Assertiveness, contrary to popular misunderstanding, is not the enemy of kindness; it’s the bodyguard of kindness. It’s there to protect what others choose to neglect.

If an abusive or manipulative energy pattern manifests in your life, do the most dignified, democratic, and diplomatic thing you can possibly do: ANNIHILATE IT!

You’re nobody’s clown. You’re nobody’s tool. You’re nobody’s slave. You’re nobody’s punching bag. You’re nobody’s emotional sponge.

You’re a being of intrinsic nobility.  Honor all, but take shit from none.

Joan Rivers brilliantly quipped, “If God wanted us to bend over he would put diamonds on the floor.”

Do. Not. Bend. Over.

Adopt a zero-tolerance policy towards all forms of invalidation and bow your head to no one who is unwilling to bow their head to you.

If it threatens to put an end to YOU, put an end to IT!

And for those who need me to state it explicitly, here’s my disclaimer and my two cents all in one:

Psychological vigilance isn’t about harming or killing people. It’s about getting rid of self-defeating patterns and self-negating perspectives.

It’s about looking at the elements of oppression that seek to be a part of your life and firmly saying, “let me help you die!”

This Post Has 17 Comments
  1. Haha, I found this highly ironic considering the fact that I teach an underage self-defense class, and I am generally the punching bag. But a wonderfully inspiring post, I think I might use it in my next class session.

  2. Wow! Wish I had read this 30 years ago!

    Took me a while in my life to come to the
    same realization. Only in recent years did
    I see that subtlety does not work on those
    trying to make you “bend over.” That only
    bluntness works.

    The bluntness of being “militant about your
    well-being.” THAT speaks volumes!

    I think reasonable people put up with too
    much out of a respect for the laws of life,
    goodwill, and hoping to get the same in

    In New York their motto is: “If someone
    spits in your face, you don’t say it’s raining.”

    Considering Malcolm X and his life and the
    negative forces even within his own group,
    and that he was assassinated, he did know
    what he was talking about.

    “Send it to the cemetery.”

    Every line is worth repeating. Great post.

  3. Wow! Bravo!

    Way to start with a great quote and take it farther, making it useful and helpful psychologically everyday. Abusive relationships, brief or long, cannot be tolerated. Send it to the cemetery. Back to the drawing board, to redesign it and resurrect it as a reciprocal, equal relationship.

    Nice mantra. Another that I use: “I cannot be your master and I refuse to be your slave.”

    Thanks for a great post! Cheers!

    1. Hi Emmy,

      Was going to answer your post on anger
      from 3-4 months ago? Then my business
      got very hectic and I didn’t see your name
      until now.

      You challenged my point about men having
      more problems with anger than women and
      I think you’re quite right.

      As I thought about it, perhaps we are used to
      seeing more men express their anger (some
      inappropriately) but most women are taught
      that it is not a appropriate. So women may
      have as many (or more) problems with anger.
      (Explicitly or implicitly.)

      Either way looks like both genders have learned
      some erroneous attitudes about this. (And other

      There were other points that you brought up but
      will hold off for now.

      Regards, Alana 🙂

      1. Hello Alana!
        I don’t seem to remember this conversation, but if you know the name of that particular post, I would gladly reread it and refresh my memory of the topic.

        And don’t worry about getting back to me so late, I haven’t had a computer for a while, so it’s perfectly alright.

        As far as what I do remember of the subject, I agree that both genders have learned erroneously.


        1. Hi again Emmy.

          The original post was from Dec 2/2012!
          Further back than I thought. No wonder
          you don’t remember it. Eek! I thought it
          was more recent. I was much busier than
          I realized.

          The post was “When you lose your cool,
          you lose.”

          Glad to see your computer is back.

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