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86% of your week is problem free Pt 2

Yesterday’s post (click here to read) addressed the idea that our problems, measured as physical events occurring in real-time, constitute a very small percentage of  our actual lives. Yet, these “small” problems seem to set the tone of our entire day. A 15 minute argument with a co-worker can amount to a week’s worth of sleeplessness. Let’s talk a bit about why this happens.

Most problems are imaginary

One of the primary reasons that small problems seem to consume so much of our energy is because we’re conditioned to use our imagination against ourselves.

Not only do we argue with the “jerks” at work, but we take them home with us in our imaginations and continue our debates. We fantasize about what we should have said or will say next time. Not only do we embarrass ourselves at work, but we actively choose to subject ourselves to the experience over and over again by reenacting it in our imagination.

It’s bad enough when others seem to create trouble for us. It’s even tougher when we create trouble for ourselves by voluntarily meditating on unpleasant experiences.

It seems that in many cases where “bad” events do happen to us, our greatest problem lies in how we use our imaginations to sustain and amplify the existence of the event.

If you can’t find it on a map, it’s in your mind

As physical events, most of your unpleasant encounters don’t even exist anymore. They’re nowhere “out there” for you to find.

That embarrassing moment you had last month when you put your foot in your mouth? You’d have to hop into a time machine to find it now.

The guy who cut you off in traffic this morning is not in front of you right now. He’s somewhere having the time of his life at a pool party while you can’t even enjoy your dinner because you keep talking about him.

Get inside of your own head before someone else does

Most of your troubles exist primarily in the mental world of memory, imagination, and interpretation.

If you can just get control of that, you can significantly reduce the amount of daily stress, frustration, and unhappiness you feel.

Resist the temptation to start dwelling on the things you can’t change (ie. past events that don’t exist anymore).

Focus more on what’s going on inside of you and you’ll have a lot more psychological and physical energy available for the more difficult problems.

In the future, I’ll be talking more about how you can reduce stress by reorganizing and gaining more control over the contents of consciousness.

For now, that’s today’s two cents.

Cheers,

T.K. Coleman

86% of your week is problem free

 
Conflict is an idea that exist primarily in the mind. As I minimize conflict in my thoughts, I reduce conflict in my experience.

90% mind, 10% matter

Have you ever heard the idea that your world is 90% mind, 10% matter?

It’s been well said that “life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it”. Let’s really think about this for a moment, because this would be a very important concept if it’s actually true.

Even if we can’t do anything about 10% of our lives, 90% is still an awfully high percentage to maintain control over. Most people I know would be thrilled if they could just improve their lives by a mere 50%.

What’s the bottom line?

Let’s conduct a thought experiment.

Close your eyes and imagine an unpleasant experience from your past. It can be an argument with a friend, an embarrassing moment at work, whatever makes you feel unpleasant. Take your time and relive that experience thoroughly. Done?

Now ask yourself “how long was that event in real-time?” How much time did you actually spend arguing with your friend or embarrassing yourself at work? Please keep in mind the fact that I am not asking you to measure how long the problem affected you? I only want you to calculate how long the physical event of being in the presence of the problem actually lasted.

Do the math

While most of our unpleasant experiences may be relatively short-lived, let’s just assume that your experience lasted for a full, non-stop, uninterrupted period of 24hrs.

Now take 24hrs and divide that by the number of hours you’ve lived in the past week (168hrs per week).

24hrs/168hrs= 0.14

So that problem, measured as a physical event, constitutes about 14% of your life in the past week alone.

Is this not astonishing?

How can an unpleasant event that only comprises a meager 14% of our entire week, dominate our whole lives?

In Tomorrow’s post, I’ll give my two cents on why we allow “the 14%”, or what Richard Carlson called “the small stuff”, to push us around and block us from the life of happiness that is rightfully ours.

I hope you’ll join me. In the meantime, keep your head up.

Cheers 🙂

T.K. Coleman

Kiss the Frog: Creating happiness through the power of appreciation

The fear of being stuck with happiness

Everybody wants to be happy.

Even though we all want to be happy in theory, we don’t always give ourselves permission.

Why would we do that? Because happiness is considered to be dangerous.

Although every one wants to feel good, we fear that being happy will pacify us and ultimately destroy us.

Unhappiness is like an abusive lover that we’re afraid to leave because we don’t believe in our ability to get through life successfully without having him in our lives.

We’re afraid to love our lives as they are because we fear being stuck with an unwanted condition.

If we allow ourselves to be happy NOW, even though we have some things going on that we don’t like, we fear we might become complacent.

To many people, being happy no matter what sounds identical to settling for less. On the surface, it seems so much more responsible to analyze what’s wrong than to appreciate what’s right.

Appreciation might be the moral thing to do, but who wants to get stuck with a mediocre life? So we dismiss appreciation as a waste of time and dive right into the bad stuff. After all, that’s what we’re trying to get rid of, right? So WHY NOT focus more on the bad stuff?

Rethinking the concept of appreciation

 
Well, contrary to popular belief, appreciation is not just an act of maturity. It’s an act of creativity. When we highlight and emphasize what’s good about our lives, we ascend to a level of consciousness that empowers us to create more of the same.

There are some who would have you believe that you shouldn’t be happy as long as there are things wrong with your life or the world. This idea is based on the notion that happiness is just a fleeting emotional sensation. At its deepest level, however, Joy is a creative force. When you feel good, you are in alignment with the very energy that creates worlds. And no state of being is more powerful or productive than that.

Waiting for your life to improve before you choose to be happy would be like the princess waiting for the frog to turn into a prince BEFORE she kissed it. It doesn’t work that way. At some point you just gotta pucker up and love all the ugly aspects of your life. Because you enjoy kissing frogs? No! Because your prince is trapped inside of there and you’re not going to let “being grossed out” keep you separate from him.

But you’ve gotta kiss the frog FIRST.

“I aint kissing that bleeping frog”, you may be thinking.

Well you don’t get to see the prince of your dreams until you chuck it up and kiss that ugly thing sitting over there.

“I’ll really live life once it becomes lovable” we think. But you have to love your life until it becomes livable.

That’s what tough-minded optimism is all about!

What are your thoughts?

Cheers 🙂

T.K. Coleman

The unwanted is the underestimated in disguise Pt 2

I ended my last post (click here to read) by mentioning the power we have to promote problematic people and situations to a more useful function in life through the making of slight adjustments in perspective. Let’s continue following that train of thought.

The power of the processing process

 
You are free to be my enemy. I cannot control your freedom of choice with my thoughts. But I am free to process my personal experience of you in whatever manner I choose and it is this choice, alone, which determines my fate in life.

What is often left out of most discussions on dealing with unwanted people and conditions, is the sovereignty we maintain in how we “process” our experiences. “Processing” refers to a set of activities which include interpreting what a given event  means, assessing the value it has, determining what its relationship is to other elements in one’s life, and deciding what kind of response best fits the situation.

Understanding the options available to us in the “processing process” is the key to realizing the limitless extent of our creative power. More specifically, in this context, “processing” is the primary tool we use to maintain the control necessary to alchemize the personal and circumstantial enemies in our lives.

The coat of many colors

In the Book of Genesis, we are told the story of Joseph, the boy who wore the coat of many colors. As a child, his heart was filled with many wonderful dreams. But his brothers envied him and sold him into slavery. They stripped him of his prize coat, poured the blood of an animal over it, and concocted a story of how he’d been killed by a wild beast.

While most people would have been emotionally and spiritually defeated by such a cruel act of betrayal, Joseph kept his focus on well-being. Joseph had been stripped of his material coat, but that was only a temporary outer symbol of his inward ability to colorfully clothe the unwanted conditions of his life with creative thinking.

The energy of his positive focus radiated throughout the Universe and attracted a sequence of seemingly miraculous events which culminated in him becoming a great ruler. At a later time, when his brothers apologized, Joseph said to them;

“You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.”

Joseph understood this great principle of thinking in harmony with the laws of well-being.

Affirming autonomy in the face of adversity

This philosophy is not a matter of letting people run over us. Nor is it a lesson which promises that we will be loved by all people.

This is a powerful dosage of esoteric wisdom which reminds us of the divinely endowed ability we have to transform our reality through the creative power of thought.

When we affirm autonomy in the face of adversity; and confess order in the presence of opposition, then we summon only those qualities from others that find agreement with our harmonious thoughts.

In this way, we “please the Lord.” When we “please the Lord”, those people, places, and conditions which once seemed to work against us will take on a new function. Though they may swear against our joy, they will be the very instruments by which that joy is obtained.

There’s an old saying “if you can’t beat them, join them.” Well, the reverse is also true. If someone can’t beat you, then they must join you. If you let no one defeat your joy, then they must become a contributor to your joy, whether they know that’s what they’re doing or not.

That’s just how powerful you are when you think in harmony with the Divine Order that exists at the very center of your being.

That’s my two cents. How do you intend to invest that?

T.K. Coleman

I tap the Source of all blessings

“When we first focus our thoughts and energies on life’s highest purpose, there follow the most efficacious earthly consequences. It is only when we tap The Source of all blessings that blessings become the lot of mankind. ‘Seek ye first the Kingdom of God and all these things shall be added unto you.’ 
 
Once we have our fundamental principles straight; once we have brought ourselves into harmony with Divine Providence; then, our social problems untangle and the way to individual growth, evolution, emergence becomes clear. Life and liberty unobstructed by man, yes! But there is more, for in seeking to realize life’s highest purpose lies the pursuit of happiness. We are truly happy only when we are in a perpetual state of hatching, our own consciousness opening to Infinite Consciousness.”
 
-Leonard Read, founder of the Foundation for Economic Education
 

Is it possible to live above life’s turmoil? To be IN the world but not feel dominated BY the world? To fully engage the whole of life without self-compromise? To do work one feels called to do and be of meaningful service to society? To love AND be loved? To know power as an innate quality and creativity as a birthright? To face fears with a sense that there’s a Divine Spark within us that can never be extinguished?

In this moment, let us center our awareness in a consciousness of the Divine Reality. Let us affirm that  our being is rooted in God’s being and only that which is expressive of Infinite Good has place in our lives. As we invite the energy of compassion and creativity to be our constant companions, the floodgates of peace and prosperity are opened mightily in every direction.

From this place of centered awareness, affirm with me:

I live, move, and have my being in a Boundless Ocean of peace, possibility, and prosperity. The Living Waters of Infinite Good are flowing through me now and my soul is refreshed. I am riding the waves of Spirit as I joyfully surf along this powerful Stream of Well-Being!

Today I open my heart to the endless bounty and infinite beauty of this magnificent Universe. I join hands with the forces of good and through this connection I am empowered to create, encouraged to love, and excited to live.

I bless every APPEARANCE of lack and conflict in my life, for they are not here to harm me. They are wonderful teachers and delightful gifts. They are here to teach me how to look beyond the APPEARANCE of things into the spiritual REALITY of Unconditional Love that lies behind all. As my vision of this REALITY intensifies, I draw more of its energy into my experience.

All is love. My heart is open. There are no threats. All is well. Behind the appearances of chaos, confusion, and conflict is the unchanging and invincible reality of Infinite Peace.

I choose to live in this realm of unquantifiable abundance & unlimited wellness! I look beyond all forms and manifestations towards the limitless potential of Unmanifest Being.

My attachment to outcomes is now released as I place my faith in that which is beyond my ideas and expectations.

It is so and so it is!

T.K. Coleman

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