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Sometimes there’s no lesson to learn

Have you ever trusted someone only to have them disappoint you?

Have you ever failed to close on an important business deal?

Have you ever been in the middle of a great day, only to have drama spring up out of nowhere?

Have you ever asked for something and been told “no”?

Have you ever taken a risk and fallen flat on your face?

Have you ever tried ANYTHING that didn’t work?

Do I sound like a commercial that’s getting ready to sell you something for the low low cost of $19.95?

The unanticipated life

If you answered “yes” to any of the above questions, then welcome to life. Life is a place where the unanticipated happens and I don’t anticipate that changing anytime soon. Our experience of the unanticipated is not inherently problematic. The good and the bad of it all comes down to how we choose to process the experience. If you’re a regular reader of this blog, then you’re already familiar with two personal convictions I have:

1) Accepting disempowering beliefs leads to a quality of life that is unhealthy, unproductive, and unfulfilling.

2) Cultivating empowering beliefs leads to a creative, peaceful, and satisfying experience of well-being.

But today, I’d like to deviate a bit from my usual efforts at dismantling negative beliefs and defending empowering ones.

Today’s lesson is a non-lesson

My lesson today is simple:

Sometimes there’s no lesson to be learned.

Not getting what you want doesn’t ALWAYS mean there’s something you need to change or figure out.

Life is a process and everything isn’t meant to work out the first time around. Analyzing a situation or working extra hard isn’t going to change that simple fact.

No amount of therapy, pills, self-help courses, friends, advice, prayers, motivational speeches, sermons, effort, or thought will save you from the risks, mistakes, failures, and so-called “set-backs” that are built into the life experience.

What I didn’t learn from an experiment with failure

Back in college, as part of an ice breaker group routine at a retreat, some friends and I were faced with the difficult task of physically carrying each member of a group to a certain location without anyone’s body touching any of the objects that were deemed “out of bounds.” My friends and I figured out the perfect way to adjust our physicality and maneuver our bodies so we could outwit the rule makers and successfully accomplish the task. Our performance was stunningly excellent. Everyone was impressed with the way we navigated around inconveniently placed obstacles without letting them touch us. Then, at the very end, we failed.

 Because our time hadn’t run out, we still had a chance to start from the beginning and attempt completion. So we all huddled up and went into strategy planning mode. Everyone threw out a few suggestions for what we could do differently. After about 5 minutes of this, one of the group members said “hey, I think our approach was fine. It just didn’t work that time. Maybe we should just get out there and try the exact strategy again. We did and we succeeded.

Here’s the lesson I learned: There was no lesson to be learned from our failure. We had a great plan. It just didn’t work the first time around. That’s simply how life is. 

Maybe you’re doing just fine. Perhaps the only thing you need to do is not stop.

That’s my two cents.

Cheers,

T.K. Coleman

You have nothing to lose!

There are no sacrifices!

Remember your limitlessness!

Embrace your power! Release your fear!

Be courageously creative!

In this Universe of redemption and renewal, nothing is lost. The only thing we really “give up” is the false appearance of powerlessness and the anxiety it generates.

When you commit your mind to an empowering philosophy, you draw only Good into your experience. When you cater your conversation to well-being, the cosmos will serve only its most edifying elements to you. When you set your gaze in the direction of lovely things, lovely things will fly your way and make their nest with you. When you look for evidence that all is well, you develop the eyes to see that things could never be to the contrary.

Even that which appears to be harmful will, in the end, prove itself to have served a beneficial purpose.

So move boldly in the direction of your True Self. For there is nothing to be lost and everything to be gained.

Love & Light,

T.K. Coleman

I am independent

The quality of my life is independent

 
I don’t need to have what others refer to as a “good day” in order to create a great life.

My seemingly bad days are simply opportunities for me to demonstrate the superiority of character over circumstance.

By choosing to be larger than my conditions, I teach others how to transcend their own stumbling blocks to happiness and inner peace.

My sense of enthusiasm is independent

 
I don’t need my life to be easy in order for it to be exciting.

My challenges are there to provoke my hidden creative powers and reveal my underestimated levels of intelligence.

By letting go of my resistance to life’s difficulties and inconveniences, I transform my trials into teachers who show me how to bring a sense of flair to every moment.

My success is independent

 
I don’t need to be protected from undesirable events and unpleasant elements in order to effectively achieve my goals.

My contrasting experiences constitute the very substance out of which my dreams are made.

By looking at unwanted conditions as the raw materials for my desires, I gain the ability to assimilate them into my creative process in meaningful and enriching ways.

My significance is independent

 
I don’t need to be void of enemies, critics, and naysayers in order to be validated as a person of great worth.

All disapproval and contempt directed at me is only confirmation that I am effectively shaking things up and actively creating change in the world.

By looking at opposition as a sign that I am challenging the status quo, I reinforce my conviction that I really am a part of an ongoing revolution to empower myself and others.

I am Independent

I am not defined by anything outside of my own nature as an expression of The Infinite.

I am not limited by anything other than the beliefs I choose to accept as a free individual.

I am independent because I always get to choose what I believe, what I do, and how I express what I already am.

T.K. Coleman

You ARE the opportunity: Moving beyond ideas of scarcity & competition

“A man’s gift will make room for him and give him access to great men.” -Proverbs 18:16

We live with the idea that we occupy a prepackaged world where all of the opportunities that will ever exist are already out there and our job is to find our place in that world.

The Jewish Proverb above challenges us to envision an expanding universe where the world literally creates space for the expression of our gifts when we act on them in Faith. It doesn’t say there will BE room for our gifts, but that our gifts will MAKE room. It doesn’t say we will DISCOVER opportunities for greatness, but that our creativity will MANIFEST the opportunities.

In other words, we are not here to compete with others over what already exists. We’re here to bring forth that which is yet to be. There is no room for you in this world and that’s a good thing. If there was, you’d be a waste of space because the whole point of your being here is to contribute to the expansion of the universe by adding your own uniqueness to the mix.

The notion of searching for our place in the world is based on the idea that we need to find some person or environment that gives us permission to be who we want to be. Many times we say we’re looking to find our niche when in reality we already know what our niche is and we’re just looking for evidence that things will work out if we act on what we already know.

In tomorrow’s post, I’ll give you my two cents on why I think this approach is problematic. I’ll tell you why I think the world of consensus opinion, market research, familial support, & historical precedent is an unreliable place to look when trying to figure out who you are and what you should do with your life.

I hope you’ll join me as I make yet another attempt at arguing for your possibilities.

Until then, create a great day!

Cheers,

T.K. Coleman

To read “You ARE the opportunity: Moving beyond ideas of scarcity & competition Pt 2,” click here.

I am a perfect unfolding of the wholeness of God

I am whole as is.

I am well as is.

I am wise as is.

My pace in life is not measured by clocks and calendars, but by my steady willingness to love myself more and more, bit by bit, day by day.

Rather than evaluating myself solely in terms of the results I achieve, I choose to express appreciation for the sincere efforts I have made to become more aware and expressive of the good within me.

I count even my frustrations as markers along the path, letting me know that I am moving into a larger sense of self in which older standards of happiness and success no longer apply.

Asserting my right to evaluate my life according to my own terms and values, I choose to transcend conventional understandings of “progress” in favor of a more nurturing point of view.

I affirm that I am whole.

I affirm that I am well.

I affirm that I am wise.

I possess none of these qualities for what I have done.

Yet, I embody them all for I am a perfect unfolding of the wholeness of God.

T.K. Coleman

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