“Don’t bend; don’t water it down; don’t try to make it logical; don’t edit your own soul according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.” -Franz Kafka
None of us want to be abandoned.
None of us want to feel rejected.
No one wakes up in the morning hoping they will hear someone say, “I don’t love you anymore”, “I don’t like the person you’ve become”, or “I’m no longer interested in being friends.
Nevertheless, we all must, at some point, exercise the courage necessary to let the people in our lives experience the truth of who we are.
Sometimes, they will surprise us with their ability to accept us unconditionally.
Sometimes, they will disappoint us with their disapproval.
Either way, when we are honest in the places that we need to be, we will discover what it is like to experience our relationships as accurate reflections of our real self.
Audre Lorde wrote: “I have come to believe over and over again that what is most important to me must be spoken, made verbal and shared, even at the risk of having it bruised or misunderstood.”
What’s worse: 1) having an opinion that gets bruised? or 2) having a life that feels bitter and boring because you’re too afraid to have an opinion?
What sounds more scary: 1) Being misunderstood? or 2) being miserable and mundane because you never take the risk of being misunderstood?
Socrates said, “the unexamined life is not worth living.”
Ditto for the unexpressed life.